"Indy, why does my credit card melt?"
This will likely be pulled shortly, but it's fun while it lasts. Below is the text (lousy formatting courtesy of the seller), and as there's no photo the only thing missing is to note that its opening price was $10 million, and after two bids it was over $30 million -- not that anyone's taking anything seriously. I'm surprised eBay hasn't killed it already. (Update: 4 bids and $99,999,999 million on the bidding, this'll likely disappear soon, especially if it breaks into the billions of dollars.)
"This is a recreated Ark of the Covenant, the story of its recreation has been told in the Bonners Ferry Herald, 7183 main, Bonners ferry, Idaho 83805 208-267-5521. It must be noted that this recreated Ark of the Covenant is doing every thing just like the original did 3500 years ago. If a picture is needed contact the above newspaper for photo and the entire story, the first time the reporter attempted to photo the Ark his camera exploded. One of the things about the Ark was in its ability to converse with GOD, on a one on one level, and this Ark is no different. The Ark first came to my son (12) , Eagle Scout, and ask him if it was time to Obliterate mankind; the boy answered yes. The price for the Ark was set by the Ark itself, as it said "Their GOD is money, in this way I can Judge them."It also should be told of the ability the Ark has given me to heal by placing on of hands, I have to be asked of course. I can't say that a new ower will have God come to him in his dreams, as it does to me and my son, nor that it will give the ability to heal by placing on hands. It must be added that Person(s) unknown are interfering with my email and phone, keeping me from answering many questions or receiving emails. It has come to my attention that the above newspaper is not responding in a timely manner; if any find this to be true, then send me an address by email and I'll try to send a photo of the Ark and the ball of fire that comes from it."
Whenever I think of a reconstruction of the Ark of the Covenant, I always think back to fun conversations with the father of an old friend, over 30 years ago, and the speculation that if one built an Ark to Biblical specifications - all that gold beaten and affixed to insulating wood - it could turn out to function something like a Leyden jar - a primitive, but potent, capacitor. Let that baby accumulate a mighty charge and see the Wrath O' God (tm) unleashed when someone draws too near without being insulated. Sure to break the ice at Fundamentalist parties!
It's times like this I miss Mr. White, and regret having fallen out of contact with him for so many years, seeing him - or what remained of him - again only at his funeral.
Comments